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navigation pounds lost: 6.8 contact Last 5 rings
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2004-07-17 - 11:58 p.m. I don’t know which is more pathetic, the fact that I’m updating at 11:58pm on a Saturday night, or that I’m updating to say the WW scale was indeed right. God that sucks. The GNC confirmed the kick in the crotch to be true, so apparently I get to tack 1.4 pounds back onto my ass (probably more by now). Add to that the fact that since this horrible revelation I’ve been eating like shit, and yeah, it’s been like a relapse weekend at the crack den. The worst thing is I don’t know how to pull my plane out of its nosedive – again. I can go back to my old shock treatment standby, the London pictures. Or I could watch Tomb Raider again. I just wish I felt that unbending motivation I felt when I first started. There’s no reason to be screwing myself over when I still have a bunch of weight to lose. If there’s any light in this shit sandwich of a situation, it’s that I definitely feel disgusted and pissed off. Generally, that prompts me to get off my ass. I need to get on a roll again. I feel like a total douche for being all shocked when I gained a pound at WI. Maybe I needed an uppercut like that to spring my ass into action. Weight doesn’t magically fall off your ass. If it did, there’d be no plus size sections, Lane Bryants, or Jenny Craigs in the world. And I’m so ready to turn in my membership card to those places. My knee is still sort of bothering me from hurting it last week, but I figure I can play basketball tomorrow at like 60% effort and be okay. If it really starts hurting, I’ll take some breaks. The importance of exercise to jump starting this shit can’t be overstated. Seriously. I’m ready to start making progress again. I’ve had enough of this slacking fucking up fatty bullshit. Time to get on my horse again. |
