
2004-08-23 - 3:14 p.m.
being fat sucks part 8,237
I guess I needed the weekend to rest my legs. I’m still bitter that I’ve lost some of my endurance, but I guess I’ll get over it. The main idea is to keep exercising, no matter what. Winter is right around the corner, and winter totally fucked me in the ass last year. The great roll I was on turned into a 10 pound gain over the holidays and into January. I refuse this year. It’s too goddamn hard to shave a single pound off to be putting weight back on all casually.
I’ve never been thin in my whole life. Okay, except for the first hour of my life when I was a preemie. That thought should probably scare me, but it actually kind of excites me. I know the next chunk of weight I lose is going to be completely noticeable, and I’m bordering on my lowest weight since I was like 12-13 years old. Okay, so I admit I have fantasies of looking like Rosario Dawson or something, but either way I’m going to look so much fucking better. I’m so tired of shitty ass stores like Lane Bryant, it’s not even funny. Fucking plus size sections with their nasty Hawaiian, floral and sequined shit. It’s no wonder black makes up like 60% of my wardrobe. So yeah..eyes on the prize.
Also, I’m close to my 50 pound star with WW. The funny thing is I’ve been close to this for what seems like ages. I want that thing, and I’ve run out of patience with myself. I actually think I’m going to lose at my meeting tomorrow. I’ve been really good with my eating this week, and I’m on a quest to lose 25 by Thanksgiving. Tomorrow is the end of the first week. Maybe then I’ll finally update my stats. I will stay for my WW meeting, no matter how many douchebags I see waiting in the room. No, seriously. I’ve been skipping the meeting part lately and I feel guilty about it. So I’ll stay and hear all about the new CORE thing I plan on ignoring.
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