2005-01-13 - 11:34 a.m.
adventures of the landmonster
Well, I didn’t go to my meeting on Tuesday. Not because I was afraid of the scale (not that I would have lost), but because I’m broke. Which is sad, but true. I’ve gotten rather used to public humiliation. Anyway, yeah, I’ll be there next week.
My progress has been…uh, sluggish at best. I did well the week I re-joined WW, then I sort of started improvising, and then started eating like I was about to have my jaw wired shut. I really wish physical violence could solve this little problem with motivation that I’m having. I’d gladly take a few blows to the head if it meant I could hold this shit together. Unfortunately, it doesn’t.
The only good thing is once again, for the billionth time, I’m back on track. I’ve had a couple of good days, dropped a couple of pounds, and fuck going back to slackerism. I hate wasting time when I could be losing weight.
Truthfully, all of this fucking up and whatnot is getting really starting to infuriate me. I’m almost tired of realizing what a fucking loser I’ve been lately. I may be many things, but I’m not one of those douchebags whining about something I am perfectly capable of changing. I’m also sick to death of the constant obesity reports and shit on TV. I don’t care if this sounds incredibly selfish or unrealistic, but I’d love nothing more than to lose this weight and check out of the fatty awareness club forever. Like being offended during movies (Shallow Hal, Dodgeball, etc etc), television shows, stand-up comedy, etc. I never want to have to even think about that type of shit again. I want to be gloriously oblivious, like the ditzy bitch that works down the hall.
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